How do you budget for Christmas?
Tuesday, December 4th, 2007
We received a question from Maria asking how we budget for Christmas. We surprise people when we say we spend roughly $300 during the month of December specifically for Christmas gifts. Here are some principles we live by throughout the year to make sure we’re prepared during the Christmas season.
1. We shop all year long. If we are at a garage sale in June, for instance, we may see a great deal on a toy that we can’t pass up. Every sale we come by, we ask ourselves, “Should we save it for Christmas?” After buying it, we’ll stuff it in our closet. We have a few boxes of stuff in our closet that are “hands off” for the kids. We pull these boxes out around December 1 and sort through them all and make a list to make sure everyone gets a gift.
2. We keep to a list. All our kids get the following from Mom & Dad: 1 present, 1 book, and 1 stocking stuffer. We wrap all this on Christmas Eve after the kids go to bed. Our kids traditionally get up on Christmas morning to see a floor full of gifts under the tree. We don’t veer from our list; everyone gets the same quantity from Mom & Dad.
3. We emphasize gifts to each other. Mom & Dad aren’t the major gift-givers in our family. The kids spend December making gifts for each other, visiting the dollar store, and wrapping gifts to place under the tree. Already (today’s Dec. 4) there are about a dozen gifts wrapped and sitting under the tree.
4. We don’t give a lot to relatives and friends. We have nieces and nephews that we send gifts to, and they are, truthfully, a bigger part of our budget than our own kids. Friends don’t get a lot from us. We also don’t give to adult relatives anymore. We used to do this in our 20s, but we don’t do it anymore. We don’t feel like we’re missing anything, either.
5. We exchange Christmas letters. We pour a lot of time and energy into creating a Christmas letter that we send to approximately 300 families (we post it online, too, sometime in December). We can’t afford to give gifts to all our friends, but we don’t really feel the need to. We love our friends and we’re glad to share the Christmas season with them through letters. We take each Christmas letter we receive and tape it to the wall. By Christmas, we have hundreds of pictures, letters and cards covering our dining room wall. It is quite the conversation piece in our home. There is usually a family picture of families bigger than ours!
6. We emphasize the spiritual roots of Christmas. Gifts are awesome, and it is a great amount of fun to have the gifts stack up under the tree throughout December. We hold off on our gifts till Christmas morning. For one, this builds excitement for the kids. But more importantly, we spend Christmas Eve celebrating the Ultimate Gift of Jesus Christ to the world. Every kid prepares a “gift” to Jesus (a song, poem, speech, picture–something of their talents), we read the Christmas story from the Bible, and we sing Happy Birthday to Jesus.
That’s how the Jeubs do it! Do you have ideas on how to celebrate the Christmas season without being caught up in the expense of it all? Post your ideas in the comments section below.
December 4th, 2007 at 8:17 am
Thanks Chris for the ideas!!! Maria in NJ
December 5th, 2007 at 12:22 am
Thats great! This post is really very good and interesting and the author have given very good explanation on preparing for Christmas and celebrating Christmas well thanks for sharing a beautiful blog.
December 7th, 2007 at 11:05 pm
Aww, we also sing Happy Birthday to Jesus! And we make a special cake that we prepare in steps according to the Bible. We start with an angel food cake, because the angels first came to the shepards, then we have white icing to signify that Jesus is the snow white lamb of God, and one red candle that shows that Jesus is the light of the world, and even from birth, His blood was sent to cover our sins.
December 8th, 2007 at 8:31 am
Very nice Michelle! What a great idea to make a symbolization of the cake.
December 11th, 2007 at 3:39 pm
I love the idea of the kids making something for the other kids! We are going to start a christmas savings to start saving a little throughout the year for christmas. I started a christmas letter this year and look forward to getting yours!
Michelle,
Great idea for the symbolisms on the cake!
December 14th, 2007 at 9:41 pm
This year we went to 3 gifts per child–just as the wise men brought Jesus 3 gifts. The bigger the family gets, the harder gift giving can become. We really wanted to focus on Jesus instead of the presents anyway.
December 18th, 2007 at 1:42 am
Sorry but only 3 gifts per child??? That’s wrong. Really wrong. I have 11 kids and they each get AT LEAST 10 presents. Do you not do Santa??
December 19th, 2007 at 10:26 am
Even when I only had three kids (we have five now) my kids got three gifts each. Even if they did not also get gifts from Grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and friends, I would still have given three gifts. If it was good enough for the King of Kings, it is CERTAINLY good enough for my kids! I also found that when we went to three gifts, I put much more thought into what I got them…..and I also put much more thought into the celebration of Christmas. We do not do Santa Claus, I have no problem with families that do. However, at some point they learn SAnta is not true….and I never want my kids to apply that thought to Christ’s birth. In any case, our Christmas became far more Christ centered when we limited the presents and focused on the true gift. I am not saying that people cannot celebrate the true meaning of Christmas with LOTS of gifts….I am just saying, I think lots of gifts were distracting to MY kids.
December 19th, 2007 at 10:44 am
I think 3 gifts per child is plenty these days as to not forget the true meaning of why we celebrate christmas!
December 19th, 2007 at 10:47 am
I think that it is the spirit of the season and NOT the amount of gifts that makes Christmas special. This is the time to celebrate our Lord’s birth, and I find 3 gifts an extremely appropriate number considering that is what was given to baby Jesus. What better way to instill faith than to give children another way to connect with the Lord. That is the greatest gift.
December 19th, 2007 at 11:03 am
My kids have never really done Santa… we play the “game” and they know not to burst anyone else’s bubble, but when it comes down to it they know that mom and dad are really Santa. That said, we do one large gift for each child, then they do gifts for eachother and the rest of the family give them TONS of gifts. There is no lack of chaotic gift giving Christmas morning! They have Great Grandparents, Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, Great Aunts and Uncles, cousins, friends, neighbors… there is no shortage of gift giving going on.
The most special thing that we do Christmas morning is that the night before I hide baby Jesus from the Nativity set. They play a game that they must find baby Jesus. I think we’re going to do a scavenger hunt for it this year. I love the symbolism of waking up Christmas morning to find baby Jesus, God’s gift to us. My children know that is the most important part of Christmas.
And for the record, they’d all rather have one really nice gift that they really want than 10 gifts that would have been worth the really nice one!
December 19th, 2007 at 11:55 am
I have 7 children. My kids get 3 gifts each, plus a stocking. I do not think they are deprived in the least. But there can be more than one thing in a package. For instance, this year, one of my daughter’s gifts is clothing. In one box, she’ll be getting several pieces of clothing. It’s one gift, because that’s how it’s wrapped, but it’s an outfit, some camis, and several pairs of socks. I do the same thing with books. A few of my kids are getting books as one of their gifts. That can be 3 books or 10 books, but it’s all wrapped together as one gift. We use cloth gift bags to reduce waste, so wrapping several things as one is really easy.
We’re the largest family on the block, but our trash can lid still closes the week after Christmas, wheras most of the others do not!
December 19th, 2007 at 2:53 pm
From a very young age I (and everyone else I know) was taught that it’s the thought that counts. Regardless if 1,3 or 20 gifts are given, it is enough. I’m also certain that those 3 gifts to each child are given thoughtfully and lovingly by Chris and Wendy and are accepted graciously by their children.
It seems very logical and appropriate to give 3 gifts to each child. After all, Christmas is not about presents, but about the birth of Christ, after all.
December 19th, 2007 at 3:41 pm
This Thanksgiving we studied the Brethren who came over on the Mayflower. We were surprised to learn that the Brethren did not celebrate “Christmas” because everyday is a day to celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior and they did not want to distract from that. Whether or not we hold the Brethrens’ convictions, there was ONE gift given to us that is sufficient for all people and all times and that includes Christmas. May your celebration be filled with His joy!
December 19th, 2007 at 4:19 pm
I appreciate the insights and as a family of 8, we relate! On a humorous note, though, I wonder if anyone has considered the shere madness of Christmas wrap, boxes, plastic wrap and those annoying little twist ties, not to mention the “assembly required” nightmare, as a deterrent for indulging at Christmas? I mean, for a family of four that’s a lot of mess, but a family of eight could lose a child or family pet underneath it all!
Besides, anyone with a large family knows that it requires planning to keep it simple, and simple helps to keep the focus where it belongs.
December 20th, 2007 at 11:15 am
I think three gifts is fine. I’m even more of a grinch than some people on this thread may find acceptable. One gift is something useful–gasp–(i.e., this year, they are both getting a cd player/alarm clock), one gift is a “larger” gift, with “larger” meaning a little more expensive, and then a “small” gift. For example, dd’s “small” is earrings and ds’s “small” is a lego set, each around $10. The large and small value depends on how much I’ve saved throughout the year. We do stockings, too, with a combo of useful (chapstick, lotion, socks) and fun (slinky, legos, ornament). Wendy, I love your idea–and will implement next year–that each of the kids will make or buy something for each stocking. We’ll see how full they can get the stockings before a certain date, then I’ll fill the rest. We only have two children, and I think THAT even gets expensive. Kudos to you for your abilities to pinch a penny and be creative! Don’t let anyone drag you down. Merry Christ-mas!
December 20th, 2007 at 1:10 pm
We went to 3 gifts (from Mom and Dad) several years ago after hitting “the fulfillment curve” I read about in a book. After the 3rd gift, the little monsters started coming out, “what else did I get? Is that all? etc.,I did NOT like the attitude my children were getting. We focus more on service and worship at Christmas. My kids prefer our Brother/Sister shopping, where they get to go shopping ALONE w/mom and buy gifts for each other(at the Dollar Store-it’s much less stressful,especially w/little ones plus one gift for Toys For Tots. They wrap their gifts, and put then under their own “kid” tree.
December 20th, 2007 at 9:22 pm
Merry Christmas! When it comes to gifts it is the heart, not the number or cost, that matters. We do try to keep the qty. the same because no matter how untrue it may be, on some level kids think more gifts means more love. I thought it when I was a kid too. That said, all my 6 yo. daughter wants is a $3 hermit crab. We already have the cage from a previous crab experience so we will supplement with paints and a book. My 10 yo. son tends to want things that are more expensive so we haven’t decided yet but the qty will be the same… But I agree with the other folks that the gifts really are (or should be) understated. God and family come first. Gifts are just one way to make visible and tangible our intangible love. If you know your kids’ love languages maybe they’d rather just have a hug, a kind word, or a few minutes alone with you!
December 23rd, 2007 at 10:58 am
Some wonderful ideas here! Our kids are now all young adults but we still enjoy giving them a few things. As they were growing up, we gave them five gifts - 1) something to read (quality book), 2) something to do (activity), 3)something to wear, 4)something just for fun, and 5)something to help them grow spiritually. They also got a small ornament representing something that had been meaningful in their life that year. These may have been bought or homemade! We, too, shopped all year long at clearance sales, garage sales, antique stores, etc. It was like a scavanger hunt for adults - fun and thoughtful! More than anything, we wanted to keep the focus on Jesus and all that He means to us - very deep! Have a wonderful celebration of Him!
December 28th, 2007 at 8:35 pm
what we just did this Christmas was had the 6 oldest kids in our family draw two names, one older kid, and one younger kid(we have 12 in all) that really helped my mom and dad and let the kids get gifts for each other i really liked it and hope we do it next year!
December 29th, 2007 at 9:53 pm
That is wonderful that your children each get three gifts. Thats what my children get also. Thats what Jesus got. And Jesus is the reason for the Season.
January 2nd, 2008 at 10:51 am
I have a dollar amount that I spend on each child and when they give me their list I ask what they want to the most. That item is what they get from me and my husband. They know if they want something expensive, they might not get as many other presents. I just remind them of that.
We also get them pjs every year that they get to open in their beds Christmas morning and then they put them on to come down. Makes really nice pictures, esp since I have them sit on the steps every year on their way to see what Santa brought and take their pics….
I think the key to remember that when people say they buy 1 or 3 gifts for each child is that it could be a range of prices, from $1 - several hundred. We all have our own traditions that makes Christmas special and we shouldn’t judge anyone for those wonderful memories!!
January 22nd, 2008 at 8:14 pm
All I want to say is christmas is to comecral now days , buy this spend this . I love my kids as due so many parrents . If you raise your kids to think that christmas is for greed then they will always expect it. To me its better to teach then that its better to give than to recive and to apprecaite the gifts that they do get and apprecait what christmas is truly about and that some children dont even get christmas dinner and every year I have my kids each pick out something to donate eather to the toys for tots or something like the slavation army . Because its better to give than to recive . I also take them to cruch to help serve meals to people who dont have food to eat this is my family tradition , and we would not have it any outher way the memories are unforgetable !!!! I
January 24th, 2008 at 7:23 pm
I really like the Jeub family approach to Christmas. I don’t consider myself a Christian per se and honestly don’t feel that the winter holiday is restricted to celebrating the Birth of Christ but at the same time, I don’t like how it has become a name-brand, keep-up-with-the-neighbors holiday. I even see the children of friends buying pricey gifts for several classmates nowadays. Christmas, Hannukah, Solstice, etc. should mean more than a gift grab, don’t you think? And while I personally like the idea of giving a new (not previously owned) gift whenever possible, it’s true that any toy is a used toy once it has been unwrapped
One silly suggestion that might be reasonable as the children grow older: perhaps a gift-exchange (drawing names out of a hat) might be fun (every gets a gift) but still keeps the overall cost down.
January 28th, 2008 at 9:44 pm
I stop schooling (we homeschool) for the whole month of December and focus on the reason for the season. We start by celebrating St. Nick’s Day on December 6th. This is when I give my 6 children their stockings. In them are the essentials like a tooth brush, hair brush, socks and underwear, lip balm. These items (except for the tooth brush) are only given on this day once a year! We do not pretend, nor have we ever made taken for granted the wonderful deeds of St. Nicholas. We really make a day of celebrating the memory of the Samaritan he was. Then the next day out comes all of the nativity. We set up the whole living room with these 5 inch figures from a company called Fontanini. I have collected (new pieces like towns, kings tents, etc., every year) them for 18 years now. I even have a pregnant Mary that is riding on the back of a donkey and a Joseph that leads the donkey with a staff! They slowly move through the living room, finally making it to the town of Bethlehem on Christmas Eve. My children have so much fun moving all the animals around and the women and shepherds and children in the busy town. It is tax time, a lot of things are happening here! Before bed on Christmas Eve, my little ones giggle with delight as they send Mary and Joseph to “The stable”…such a humble place for a King. We leave all the animals in the stable and turn all their heads to the manger. While the kids are asleep I take out pregnant Mary and put in the much thinner version
and then I put little baby Jesus in the manger. In the morning they run to the manger and giggle and shout like they have never seen it before, “Baby Jesus was born last night!!” I imagine this is the same excitement some families experience with the surprise of the visit with Santa. We then give 3 gifts to each child. Every year I look forward to that excitement of the discovery of baby Jesus on Christmas morn. I have often wondered how we could daily find a way to experience Jesus this way. If only Christmas was every day 
February 6th, 2008 at 1:03 pm
We always used to feel like we had to buy everyone a gift. This really became impractical, and it was so easy to fall into the “commercialized” Christmas mind set. My sister’s house is where we celebrate Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Now that all of the kids are older (the youngest are 18) we decided to ask everyone about doing a $25.00 gift exchange. The response to go ahead with it was unanimous. So in my family which consists of my husband, son, and myself, we spent a total of 75.00 for gifts. I purchased a gift for a female, and then we purchased two gifts for men. We absolutely had the most fun, and we weren’t broke!! My sister put names in a hat and the first person to pick a gift from under the tree had the option to keep that gift, or pick another gift. We were pleasantly surprised by the creativity of some of the gifts, and no two gifts alike. We plan to do this every year. After the gift exchange, we sang Christmas carols with my Brother’s karaoke equipment. Our families are all Christians, and this less is more idea really worked for us. We enjoyed the fellowship of each other, and the next day some of us served breakfast to people in the community who live in the local Homeless Center. We were reminded how Blessed we truly are. Peg
February 6th, 2008 at 2:24 pm
It’s nice to read how other large families handle gift-giving. That’s funny that you spend more on nieces/nephews than your own kids because that often ends up being the case with us as well.
Our six children are very young, but for now we have a limit of $20 per child and shop year-round for sales and for “that perfect gift” for each one. They get an outrageous amount of gifts from grandparents, but tend to love best the one thing that we got them because it is exactly what they wanted!
We just started doing stockings and we fill it with the rare treats of candy, gum, and dollar tree “fun” toys and they LOVE it.
I love the idea of the kids buying each other gifts, too. Thanks for sharing!
February 10th, 2008 at 9:50 am
One year my children received lots of presents. The next year I asked them what they got for Christmas. They did not remember any thing and we were opening up presents for an hour. so we decided to just buy one family gift. We got a trampoline one year. The next year a go cart and they had to follow clues to find it. And they remember. This year we put there presents on the table and played a game. Four sets of dice being handed around when you got doubles you grabbed a gift. When the few in the middle were gone you stole a gift then after two minutes when the timer went off who ever was holding the gift opened it and gave it to the person it belonged to. It was real fun.
May 1st, 2008 at 6:23 am
Is #7 serious? Wow. We’re on a totally different page. We actually don’t give any presents to our kids on Christmas, but instead save them for their birthday. We’re trying to figure out how to keep the focus of our minds on Jesus Christ, and not on ’stuff’. We do lots of driving to see family too and that eats up a fair chunk of change now-a-days
My $0.25
May 8th, 2008 at 11:49 pm
I’m not a parent, but I am a college student with a family of seven (and growing) to get gifts for (often in addition to buying a plane ticket to go home for Chritmas). I pinch every penny I can but still find I can’t buy all that much, or I think what I _can_ afford is “lame”…..but this last Christmas I came up with an idea:
I had signed up to take ceramics just because I needed an art class. A couple weeks into the semester I got the brilliant idea that rather than buying gifts I could make them (we’ll ignore the fact that art is NOT my strong subject).
I was pleasently shocked. Everyone loved what I had made for them, and in actually making them I broke the cycle of finding one thing for someone, then deciding that would make a great gift for seveal others as well. I made a gift for all seven people, and all it cost me was the clay I used that I had to buy for class anyway, and I got a grade of a B in the class. It’s definaely somethng that’s going to happen more regularly.
I had to laugh at your comment about going to the dollar store for gifts. Been there, done that. A friend and I joking led me to go once to the dollar store for gifts. They’ve got a lot of neat things for gifts, and not only for kids.
May 11th, 2008 at 8:03 pm
We have 7 children and we also just give 3 gifts. Each child has an ornament that is a box so I find something that fits in there (one year it was a one-month gift certificate to Club Penguin). One toy gift (Garage sales or super sale stuff). Then each child gets their own box of cereal. (We don’t eat much cereal, let alone sugary name-brand IN A BOX cereal.) I budget $20 each child.
We also celebrate Hanukah so that is when the children give gifts to each other…usually from the Dollar Store.
By the way, I NEVER give clothing as gifts, even for their birthdays. I think clothing/shoes are necessities. And what kid is excited to get clothing anyway?
May 11th, 2008 at 8:07 pm
Wait, I need to clarify my “what kid is excited to get clothing anyway” comment. My children are all under 10. I’m sure there are teenagers that enjoy clothes.
June 22nd, 2008 at 1:00 pm
I want you to know that as a 15 year old teen girl, I admire you. Some people have said things to try and break your spirits and wreck all hope, but I want you to know that I think the world of you all. I think that 3 gifts is enough. Some children in the world don’t get any. You two people are amazing and I admire your strength. You have a beautiful family.
May God Bless you in Spirituality and Health,
Amber
July 15th, 2008 at 6:06 pm
Honestly I think that as long as all the kids get around the same value in gifts there won’t be much complaining about not getting enough gifts, plus Christmas isn’t about gifts. How much do kids really need? Many toys get played with only a few times when they have alot, so whats the point in spending so much money?
August 2nd, 2008 at 11:56 am
I have 2 children, ages 9 and 4…this year, after being inspired by the Jeub Family and their “3 Gift” concept, we’re going to try it. It’s very important to us that our kids that they don’t fall into the trap of “more is better”. We want our kids to grow up well-rounded individuals that don’t worry about “keeping up with the Jones’s”. I am a stay at home mom, so we are living on one income…in these difficult economic times, our new family motto is “I have all I need”. I am so blessed to have a loving husband and two healthy, loving children!
September 12th, 2008 at 8:14 pm
There is value in keeping a check on how much you give your children for sure. Last year we spent a ton on our kids and vowed, almost immediately that this year would be far less. On the one hand it was a good feeling to have all the major purchases completed for the kids, but also it ended up being a bit of a hardship, and then that’s not a fun holiday for US. Mind you, our kids never expected to get as much as they got, nor would they have ever asked for so much. It always feels nice to do for your kids, but I have to say I really like the idea of going a little easy this year and letting ourselves “off the hook” so to speak.
Thanks to everyone for sharing their ideas and thoughts.
September 12th, 2008 at 8:17 pm
Oh, and I wanted to add one more thing. Tanya, you mentioned that you are a stay-at-home mom. I am too finally. For the past year and a few months after working 15 years and I can tell you that YOU BEING HOME WITH YOUR KIDS IS THE BIGGEST AND BEST GIFT - BEYOND ANYTHING YOU COULD EVER BUY FOR THEM. It gives me personally, endless joy being home with my kids finally and I just love to hear about other mom’s who are able to do it too. Christmas, can become more about traditions and cozy times and happy contentment than about chasing purchases.
October 20th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
We are a family of 10 and have completely re-thought Christmas and gift giving. We have gotten away from gift giving completely, and won’t go back! Last year, we adopted an orphanage in Uganda, and spent “Christmas money” that we would have spent buying gifts for children, and helping them buy gifts for each other, and purchased shoes, socks, underwear, pants and shirts for Ugandan orphans. Our children were thrilled, and touched, and we celebrated the true meaning of Christmas. When we “give” gifts to others, we often donate in the names of others, and send them a note detailing that gift. For example, our kids will send 5 soccer balls, in their cousins’ names, to Africa. One year, they sent a goat, and several chicks in their grandparents’ names. The Heifer Project (and another, just can’t recall their name right now) puts out a Christmas “catalog” of items you can purchase for prices from $2 and up…My kids don’t “know” what a Christmas wish list is - they focus instead of how we can bless others at Christmas time, just like we were all blessed with the ultimate gift - Jesus, the Messiah. Our children WILL make gifts for each other - often drawing pictures, or making some small craft project, using what we already have at home. (For example, the younger girls are learning to embroider, so they are talking about making something for their grandmother using embroidery.)
October 21st, 2008 at 10:15 am
I will definately be practicing the three gift idea this and every year from now on. We are a blended family with our fifth on the way and I must admit that I have a hard time (picking out) buying as many gifts for my step children as I do for my birth children it is just easier to buy gifts for the kids who are with you 365 days a year (you know what they like). This will solve everything.
November 4th, 2008 at 12:52 pm
One thing we do as well is to have the kids make or buy (dollar stores are wonderful!) a gift for someone else. Every year on Christmas Eve we cart them off to a nursing home, find out which residents have little or no family visitors, and then each child picks a “grandma or grandpa” to adopt. They give them their gift, hold their hand, talk to them or whatever they are comfortable with. It makes Christmas that much more meaningful to my children when they get to see the look on the faces of their “grandparent”. It helps to reel them in from the typical Christmas chaos of “I get presents!” And turns them more toward, “I felt good after making him/her smile”.
November 17th, 2008 at 7:36 pm
I will also be going to the 3 present rule this year. We have given 10+ presents to each child in the past and most of the gifts never have been played with. Not to mention my daughter still has a gift in the box in her closet from last christmas. We are about to live on a very tight budget with work hrs being cut and look forward to teaching the children how to live on a budget and have a happy and good life. I also Homeschool the children and have a 6 wk old baby to enjoy this year! Happy Holidays to all.